Reprove to Improve?

So Amber and I just finished Family Home Evening. We're trying to get into an established routine after attempting it more times than I can count. I was responsible for the lesson tonight, and the topic of motivation was the thirst that needed quenching.

The scriptures pointed to the Lord as the ultimate source of motivation, but that the desire must rise within us. Like faith, motivation requires no more than just a desire to be/do something and if you let that righteous desire work within you, the Lord will "establish your thoughts" (Proverbs 16:3). Also, the DO Commandments (love one another, let virue garnish your thoughts) are more powerful motivators than the DO NOTS (thou shalt not...).

Upon finishing the lesson, the topic of what a spouse should do when they want to help their spouse avoid something that would be detrimental to their progress. I voiced my opinion that motivation must come from within and from one's dedication to the Lord, so a reproving comment from a spouse does nothing but spark a fire of resentment. The talk got a little heated as Amber opined that a spouse should do/say something to help their significant other improve and continually strive to raise his/her standards. The discussion turned from general to specific and I found myself on the defensive.

After spending time with my thoughts, away from indicting fingers and defensive counterarguments, I must say that Amber was right. My spiritual judgment was blocked by my selfish yearning for independence and my desire to settle for less. I frequently hold my own hands over my face and refuse to admit that I am blinded. It is my pride that blinds me.

I am very blessed to have a wife who is continually striving for improvement. She has made more of me in four years than I did in 23. I am more determined and more productive with her by my side, and for that I am grateful. She has every right to help me see the error of my ways, or to help me avoid a pitfall of my own making. I need to return the favor and help her realize her goals and aspirations, instead of taking a passive role.

I am blessed to have Amber with me.